change requires courage + courage requires change
last call for creative courage early bird discount and group journaling on saturday
When my kids were little, I had an assortment of bad habits and preoccupations that later made me question what kind of parent I’ve been. I was raising them while raising myself, and it seemed I would never grow up. I didn’t trust myself—my decisions, my instincts—and I believed that other people had all the answers.
I’m at a point in my life where I can see how my issues affected my babies, and it’s a hot topic in my therapy sessions. Perhaps I create associations where there are none, but I create them nonetheless.
I experienced long seasons of depression, where I was physically present, but mentally on another planet. There were promises I made but didn’t keep, usually because of overwhelm, anxiety, and irrational fears. Too often, they saw me not speaking up for myself, not holding myself or other people accountable, shrinking. There’s so much I wish I’d taught them early on that I’ve only recently learned myself.
Logically, I know that parents are human and that we all bring our baggage into the job. But when I see my kids doing what young people must do —making mistakes, learning the hard way at times — I tend to make it about me. If they have a problem, I reactively think it’s because of something I didn’t teach them.
This way of thinking is not helpful to me or them. We can’t go back. All we have is the present. All we can do is learn and grow. So instead of wallowing in regret, I open up and initiate discussions to find meaning and understanding.
We talk about their childhoods. We talk about the joy but we also talk about the pain points that throb in each other’s memories. These conversations happen organically, but with intention, because I want to show them how truth and expression heals. Because this is not what I was taught. I was taught to struggle in silence.
Change requires courage.
A few years ago while I was deep in my self-discovery work, I realized that I was part of a cycle that I wanted to break. My mother struggled with mental illness, and I suspect that my grandmother struggled, too. Who knows how far back it goes. The silence around it hurt more than the illness itself. The lack of healing conversations, the absence of truth and transparency—the impact will echo on if I don’t interrupt it. Grasping this reality gave me courage to find my voice.
Courage requires change.
To cultivate courage, you have to question your fears, latch onto your values, and hold on for dear life. You have to shift your priorities. You can’t romanticize courage, thinking you’ll wake up one day with all the right moves and the resolve to end patterns that have been burrowed into your brain since childhood. You have to start small and practice daily. You have to take risks and be uncomfortable. You have to be willing to peel back layer after layer and let yourself be seen.
We need creative courage to break old patterns and begin new chapters.
What new chapter in your creative life have you been putting off? What habits need to change? What truths need to be expressed? What kind of help do you need? What is the first step?
the creative courage writing intensive
In the Creative Courage Writing Intensive, which runs from January 11 - March 21, you will be guided through a 3-month transformation of how you think about creative courage and how to cultivate it in your life. With mentorship and community, you will ask yourself hard questions and explore the answers through creative expression.
Early bird registration ends today, and the regular registration period will begin tomorrow. If this opportunity speaks to you, I hope you will join us. More details below.
the practice: our monthly group journaling session
If you’d like to join us for our monthly group journaling session on Saturday, December 16, you can find the links to register below. Our special guest will be Dr. Sophia Godkin. Known for helping people to develop true confidence, create satisfying relationships, and become truly happy from within, Dr Sophia (@thehappinessdoctor) shares practical tools for happiness through in-person and online individual and group coaching, courses, and writing.
Through carefully selected prompts from her book The Couple's Gratitude Journal, we'll venture inward and explore thoughts, feelings, and insights that speak to the heart of human connections. Whether the connection is between romantic partners or friends, the prompts and our surrounding discussion will provide you with a taste of how gratitude in its most genuine form can serve as a gateway to deeper relationships.
Thank you for reading!
write with us:
Open until December 15. If you’re seeking a transformative series on courage, vulnerability, and the creative process, the next cohort of The Creative Courage Writing Intensive starts in January. The early bird discount is open until December 15. To access the details, you can sign up here and I’ll email you the link.
December 16. The Practice: Group Journaling Session #10 w/ Dr. Sophia Godkin // 11 - 12:30 pm Reminder: The Practice, our monthly group journaling sessions, are free for paid subscribers, or you can drop in for a $15 fee. Paid subscribers, scroll down to the bottom of this page to access the Zoom info.
Open until December 31. If you’re seeking a soul-focused creative mentor and community, through the month of December only, you can join the Inner Story Writing Circle at a 12% discount by signing up for the full year of 2024. You can learn more here.