quick to judge
story work exercise
The following post is a Story Work exercise from the weekly series that is for paid subscribers. Going forward, I’m moving this series from Squarespace to Substack and by becoming a paid subscriber, you will receive reflections and exercises like this in your inbox every Sunday night at 8 pm et, plus access to our monthly group journaling session, The Practice. If you are interested in receiving this weekly flow of self-reflection ideas for your writing practice, and more access to a creative community, consider becoming a paid subscriber.
“When we make judgments of ourselves or of others, we cast attention to a thought or belief that is limiting and sometimes negative and when taken to an extreme can put ourselves, or our flexible mind, into a box. So, thinking about how we look at and feel about the world and ourselves can affect whether we are open, accepting, and flexible enough to work at the top of our creativity.” — Alice Berry
Judgment is a creativity killer. In creative circles, we often talk about not judging ourselves, but many of us don’t realize that judging others also inhibits our creativity.
Is being judgmental of others making you less creative?
If we value the freedom to express ourselves authentically and experiment with our creative voices, then we need to be able to give others the same space that we want for ourselves. This is not always easy. When my son sticks his air pod in my ear and says, “Mom, listen to this new song”, I resist the urge to immediately dismiss it just because it doesn’t sound like the rap and r&b that I grew up listening to. When my daughter tells me about all the piercings she’s going to get as soon as she’s of age, I resist the urge to voice my fears about how people will perceive her because of them. When I’m not a fan of a particular writer’s work, I resist the urge to question their success.
We can be discerning about what we like and don’t like without making judgments about what’s good or bad. When we are constantly making judgments, we stifle our own creativity.
Berry goes on to say, “Opening our attitudes and thinking can help us develop a flexibility of mind and acceptance of difference that benefits our own creativity. Assuming you know what someone’s work means without seriously making the effort to learn or understand it, then dismissing it without making that effort limits your own ability to learn, understand, and creatively engage.”
So how can we become more aware of this dynamic? We can question our judgments when they come up. We can find connections between our judgments of others and our own fears. This is our exercise for this week.
Exercise:
Reflect on your creative fears and how they show up in the judgments you make about others. What types of creative expression do you often judge as good or bad, perhaps without making an effort to understand it? How do you think this judgment affects you through the different stages of your creative process?
What is Story Work?
Story Work is the name of my current book-in-progress and it describes a process of reflection, reclaiming, and reimagining. It involves looking at your life experiences as creative material that you have the power to shape. When you see your life as a story full of turning points and transformations, you can use creative thinking to reshape narratives that don’t serve you. By cultivating this ability, you can uncover compelling storylines and new visions for your life. My coaching clients and paid subscribers receive Story Work exercises every Sunday night. The topics cover universal life themes, with references from literature, philosophy, science, and spirituality; offering perspectives that spark ideas and get you writing.